Untitled, and I'm ok with that.

"Fake it 'til ya make it" has made me a much happier person.  Really- IT WORKS!  Want some soundbites? GOT THEM.  "Happiness is a choice." TRUE.  "People are just as happy as they make up their minds to be." I believe it.  Parrot that stuff repeatedly to yourself or whomever will listen and eventually, you will start to mean it, you'll believe it, and you will be happier than you used to be.

Sometimes, though, a girl just needs a good wallow (or "waller," in the proper dialect of my homeland).  Yesterday the entire universe aligned properly to give me the Perfect Storm for a 100% Legit, No-Holds-Barred angstfest.  How so?

• Jury Duty!  You can go home after sitting in the room of bodies with warring perfumes just long enough to get a killer headache, but you have to call in every day until we tell you not to to see if you have to come back.  insider tip: my schedule being up in the air freaks me the hell out.
• Clashing with a friend!  It happens. Friends have to work their shit out sometimes, and it's ok.  Timing is what timing is... and God knows, it's never a convenient time to have a Situation.
• HORMONES.  Just....yeah. Fuck you, kitten. Why are you looking at me?
• TIME TO CRY! Practice was tough last night, and in my crummy mindset it felt like it was a series of tailor-made drills designed to specifically exploit my weaknesses. It wasn't, and I know that, and I knew that then, but I still made special time to have a meltdown... and may have scarred the Coach for life.
• Guess who's not ready for Gulf Wars? THIS GIRL! Seriously, I leave on Friday for 5 days of camping, and I'm SO not prepared.

So, is it better today? Nope. I still have a residual pity-party hangover, but as of noon today, I am going to be actively forcing myself to put it in check as I spot it.